For me, the most important thing in the world is to spend quality time with my kids. And yet, it’s shocking how little time I spend. I’m always busy.
Plus, let’s just face it – it can be exhausting. My kids run a pace. It’s Barbie School, where my little girl is like, “Let the Barbie talk, Dad.”
And I’m yelling, “Line!”
Meaning, it’s so tiring! After I have done all my tasks, then to spiral back around on this chaotic day, I noticed, by then it’s just hard. It’s hard to get into it.
And by then, the kids are too tired to learn!
So I said: Enough is enough. We have to make some changes. My oldest is already 4 and I don’t want to miss out on this time. Here’s what I did to fix this problem. I started doing all this stuff and it just sort of snapped into place:
MORNING ROUTINE
I do some form of exercise or breathing routine and cold shower, and then it’s all about them. And I focus on them before get to my daily work tasks. Because if I don’t focus on them now, then it’s just not going to happen.
I know we all don’t have half an hour in the morning. But this sets up the day for the kids and for you. Is it possible you can just add 10 minutes to your morning routine for you and the kids?
This can mean reading. Going over phonics. Writing exercises. Playing with playdough together and put on some classical music. Draw and paint! Or just making breakfast together. Talking about the day. Planning snacks.
It also helps to set a timer so you make sure you get this time in. What makes this so cool, is that later in the day, when you see them, it’s like you’ve primed everything for painting.
So now it’s really easy to get in the mode when you see them again.
Remember: it’s more important to make quality time than it is to just have a whole bunch of time that is blasé.
It’s all about magic moments! Because this is what you will remember. So focus on the quality not the quantity of time.
READING ROOM
We created a special room just for the reading. This helps because when we do it in their bedroom – they just get distracted too easily. Because of the toys in their periphery.
We set up a whole bunch of fluffy pillows. And we have some space heaters and a bunch of books. And no distractions. Just flashcards, a bunch of books. Things to learn.
And then, when we’re done reading – we do stickers and games. And we just put stickers on the walls and on our faces.
Schedule Dates!
Plan and schedule regular quality time is great! It gives you both something to look forward to. And it makes for magic moments.
Some of my favorite times in my life was when I would take my child to the mall train. We had a little routine: 1. Gymnastics, 2. Mall train, 3. Get food, 4. Barnes and Nobles.
Or, maybe we would: 1. Library group activities with other kids, 2. Gymnastics, 3. Park
Parks are PERFECT for scheduled dates! You see the trees. Maybe there’s a playground.
If you want to go all out, make it a picnic.
Find a park that you just love and make it your park.
Take pictures EVERY DAY
Daily selfies are great because of the laugh factor. An iPad has all the little filters on it, too. So you can make faces. And then if you feel like it, you can make a photobook on Shutterfly!
ONE SECOND A DAY APP
There’s a cool app where you can document your time together. It lets you take one second of video and then it stitches it all together like a time capsule. So you can look at it when you’re an older person – and you can see the years shoot by, haha!
EXERCISE TOGETHER
The kids need to exercise, too! Studies are showing that just having the kids go outside all the time is the best way for them to learn.
For the cold days: We love to bounce that basketball. And we have a couple other balls too. And there’s a spot in the house we all love to go to roll it at each other.
Indoor hide and go seek is perfect. It’s also a great way to learn how to COUNT to 30!
Sometimes it’s great to go do a quick lap while the kids are in the playhouse.
COOK MEALS TOGETHER
Having that dinner time is great – and even better if you have all cooked together. This is nice to try and do at least once a week. It’s a great way to teach the kids lots of life skills.
And you don’t want them to be that one kid that doesn’t know how to make a meal because their parents did everything.
JUST INCLUDE THEM
I try and just include them in what I’m doing. “Daddy has to screw this cabinet together.” And so I’m like, “Come on. You want to come with me?” And they usually say yes!
DANCE PARTY
We have a big mirror where we can watch each other dance. We crank the tunes. And they show me their moves. It’s a spectacular work out. Exhausting. Spotify has some really great playlists of songs, too.
Here’s a link to one of our Playlists:
“This is so fun!” our kids will often say. “I can’t wait to do the bubble guns!” “I’m so excited!”
These are the words we say to each other. Because a big part of this is the anticipation of what we’re going to do. And making every tiny little thing we do an activity.
Making the bed turns into parachute where the kids get underneath the covers.
It’s never just one thing.
It’s all these little things that add up. Starting your day by spending that just 10 minutes or so with your child for quality time sets you up for the entire day with them. Because they are fresher, and so are you. The perfect time is now.